Wednesday, May 04, 2005

My Favorite Heidi

If you want to know 's secret for staying thin, try her Favortie Candies. I think I know why she likes them as candies: they're gross. And therefore she doesn't eat as much. I tried them, and I concur. I believe the first word out of my mouth, delivered to a nearby bluebird who inquired in a tweet how they were, was: Disgusting. In fact, I think she said as much in a press conference: "These are my favorite candies, because they taste so nasty that every time I eat one, it ruins my taste for all candy for 3 months."

There's little to report. I had a relaxing weekend. I finished some cool stuff, so Saturday I basically stayed in, got some cheap champagne (Korbel, which may or may not be 'cheap' champagne depending on where you're from) and drank it in a martini glass while watching a movie with some candles lit. I wanted to watch The Incredibles, but the on-demand thing didn't work, so I ended up watching this movie called My Life Without Me, about this girl who finds out she has terminal cancer and only a couple months to live. So she decides to keep it secret and make audio-taped messages for her family to play after she's gone. The cast included Debbie Harry and that really talented blond girl from The Love Life of Gillian Guess. Oh, and Scott Speedman and Mark Ruffalo. It was a pretty good movie. A li'l sad, and you knew how it was going to end. But I liked it. And I was glad that she actually died in the movie. I think the movie was Canadian--I bet if it was American she would have miraculously recovered, probably from some experimental treatment that sinister forces were trying to keep under wraps until some maverick doctor played by Julia Roberts forces the hospital to try it. That part would surely involve at least one car chase and some things blowing up. Oh, and the whole love triangle thing would end with the girl re-affirming her love to the Scott Speedman character and the Mark Ruffalo character (who she's having an affair with, to see 'what it's like to have sex with a different man') would marry the Julia Roberts character. And of course the girl would decide that sex is terrible with anyone but her husband and the Julia Roberts character would decide that she never really wanted to be a doctro at all, but just wanted to get married, and she'd quit her job to raise their blond child. Maybe Robin Williams would have his perfunctory hyper-annoying role as well.

Well, I didn't really say much, but there's 2 paragraphs there, so that's pretty good. So I guess I'll make that the beep for now.

Ed Shepp

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