Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Zombies Have Stoned the Coq au Vin!!!


Firstly, OK for Sharon Stone! I heard she was at some economic conference in Switzerland where someone was talking about children dying in Africa because of lack of mosquito nettin (to protect against malaria) and she stood up and said something like, "I'll give $10,000 to buy mosquito netting for those kids! Who will top me?!" Er, wait, that last part sounds unwholesome; but that's how it was said to me. She also said something like "children are dying and that's not OK with me!" Or something like that. But you get the point. And I say Huzza, Sharon Stone! I think it's fabulous that she was at some huge economic conference and did that--someone I know said she should 'get over herself,' but I don't agree. We need more celebrities like that. It's interesting how we hear about Sharon Stone and Angelina Jolie at these conferences, but we never hear about any of those executives who make $36 million a year putting up any cash to better the world. I wonder why that is...

I was rude to someone who worked at Subway over the weekend. Never mind that everyone behind the counter was moving as if they'd ingested the last 6 tons of the world's supply of quaaludes--I was rude. I felt bad. And then I read in one of Pema's books that you can't show lovingkindess (she calls it maitri--I don't ungastan this. Why call something by some Tibetan or Sanskrit or whatever name when you have a perfectly good English phrase to use?! Why say maitri when you can say lovingkindness? Why say Coq au Vin when you can say Mustard Greens?) to another until you show it to yourself, and it made total sense. I realized then that I was not showing lovingkindess to myself. So I had a cookie. And I bought myself some roses for my birthday week, orange and yellow. I got the cheap deli ones, so they're already wilting. But they're purty nonetheless. I'm still not sure if I'm showing enough maitri to myself, though. Maybe a nap would help...

Has everyone seen Night of the Living Dead? Were you scared? No, because you think zombies don't exist. Well, you must not have seen New York Social Diary. Here's some pix--just tell me at least some of these biatches aren't the living dead:
Don't stare too closely--your brain might melt. Don't they all look like they're grinding their teeth together, salivating over your brain? Ferrealz. And I think the guy who writes it is also a zombie. He certainly writes like one. Observe:
I felt sick to my stomach. Somehow the beauty of the afternoon was erased, deleted, and harshly too, as if I’d committed a criminal act just by being there. I wished I’d stayed out of the Park.

Ouch! I feel sick to my stomach just reading it. The beauty of the afternoon was... deleted? That's a crime in itself. (I can talk because I've NEVER EVER EVER written anything less than stellar. If my blog were cat food, it would be, like, really good cat food! Like tuna with magic diamonds in it.) But what's a bigger crime is that I'm talking about a criminal and can't find a way to tie in the Fiona Apple song. Damn the flip flops, damn them...

Lastly, for the person searching Ed Shepp Exposes Mariah Carey, if you're still out there, you can download it here.

And that's the beep for now.

Beep!
Ed Shepp


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