Ladies and gentlemen, a great woman has left us. Today Anna Nicole Smith left her earthly vessel and ascended to the great Pharmacy in the Sky. Anna Nicole taught us that no matter where you come from, no matter what your name is, you can do anything you set your mind to, whether that's being a topless dancer, posing for Playboy, marrying an ancient bagillionaire, being a mess on basic cable or being the face of a brand of iffy weight loss pills. Anna Nicole Smith was truly an inspiration.
Now you can remember Anna Nicole's inspiring example with my special Anna Nicole Smith commemorative plates (artist's rendering upper left). These plates reflect the spirit of Anna Nicole herself--classy, timeless and always appropriate. Handcrafted from the finest store-brand paper plates, these commemorative treasures are each individually painted one-by-one by hand with premium Crayola markers and can be personalized with your message. On the bottom of the plates, you'll find the Ed Shepp Originle label, your seal of Quality. These plates will last for weeks-to-years, and add some needed ritz to your crappo china collection. Order a set today, for the low low price of $599.95. You'll receive a set of 4 premium Anna Nicole Smith Commemorative plates and 2 cups, made from only the highest quality Bengalese styrofoam. You and your family will cherish them for years to come. Order now! Order now! Order now!