Thursday, October 27, 2005

Madonna Etc.

A Hallooboobooweegeran coupon for you!Guck, I'm watching that Madonna documentary now. Blips:

--Wow! She finally learned how to sing! Well, sing better (through her nose, apparently). That's if the clip from her tour is any indication. And I'm not sure it is, because her voice is all raspy when she speaks, and then it's clearer when she sings. ......OK, now she's doing Holiday--maybe I spoke too soon about her being able to sing.

--Sometimes Madonna looks like Sheryl Crow, but sometimes she looks like Baby Jane. She looks great in those glasses she wears.

--Her daughter looks and talks like her. Neither are very good things, since she'll be spending a lot of time getting those eyebrows waxed and trying to soften that pretentious accent. (I still hold that it's not a fake British accent, but attempted 'diction' taken too far. It's the harsh glottal stops that screw it all up.)

--I don't think I could suffer through a whole Madonna concert, all that kaballah crap and video shots of church choirs and stuff.

--There was a scene with Madonna's daughter telling knock knock jokes that were the very opposite of funny. Of course someone was laughing--her little brother who was what? 1 year old? But then they weren't funny only because they were really generic. I would actually love to have a bunch of people over one time where we tell the worst, most generic, unfunny knock knock jokes and not laugh.

--There's this great font she's using periodically that almost makes the scenes look like an Hermes ad. Almost.

--Madonna would have made a helluva impression in Israel if she'd worn a Hannibal Lecter mask when she landed there. And Madonna asks in her Hermes font if she can really make a difference? Not unless everyone in the Middle East turns out to actually be gay.

--GOD DAMN, Madonna!!! Leave songs like Imagine alone!!!!!!!!! You need some kind of restraining order---keep 500 feet away from all classic songs! Someone take this biotch to International criminal court!

OK, that's enough of that, because I'm sure there are 600 million gayer-than-I-could-even-conceive blogs that are very seriously liveblogging this thing.

Beep. I was going to write something else, but methinks I'll save it for later, since myne posts have become so sporadical lately. But I shall end thusly: Everyone listen to my radio show this week, The Ed Shepp Radio Experiment, cux it's my Halloween show!! And it's awesome!!! It has (the updated) How Ed Shepp Saved Halloween on it, and also lots of pieces from last year's Halloween issue of Another Ed Shepp Magaxine-Type Thinglet. It rocks, so listen in on WFMU 91.1FM or (Fridays 6-7pm)!!

And that's the beep for now, gnorklets.

Ed Shepp

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