Friday, April 08, 2005

Hayden Laden with Gayden

It's been a slow news week (the pope's dead, but hasn't he been dead for a while? Put a dark wig on him and you have Terri Schiavo, except more evil-looking), so I'll just start with this. Look at Hayden Christensen on the left there, looking all fugly. This is a travesty, I'll tellzya. Cux he used to be the fucking cat's pajamas! I can't tell you how many Mariah Carey songs I had a relationship with him to--actually I can: zero. Cux I think I stopped doing that a while ago. Time to BRING IT BACK. Hoooo! Hooooo!!! Anyway, I'm looking at this picture, and of course the greasy unwashed hair is a problem (but not that big of one), and of course the overall ickiness. But one thing that really gets me is the lazy-looking eye. Yuck. I think I have a pic where my eyes don't look like they're focusing on the same place, and I think I also corrected that in Photoshop, cux it's so disturbing. (I do not have now, nor have I ever had, a lazy eye.) Lazy eyes are the ultimate in fugly. Next thing you know we'll find out that he stu- stu- st- stu- stutt- stu- stutt- st- STUTTERS!!!!! Apologies to stutterers out there; congratulations to people who have conquered stuttering. And here's a fun exercise over the weekend: Wanna give someone a complex? Wait until they've said something and then ask them, in all seriousness: Did you used to stutter?

Anyway, one last thing about Hayden: I'm hearing from Veep, who I realized today kinda looks like the old Brawny towels man (YOU DECIDE), that Hayden is indeed one of the Gay. He was seen in WeHo sometime very recently making out with his current boyfriend, who may be a the Canadian actor who played the love interest in the Ice Princess. Well, this changes everything. And by that I mean that it changes nothing. Maybe on sunny days now I'll go outside and pretend I'm in West Hollywood and will at any moment run into Hayden Christensen and we'll get married and Uma Thurman will officiate and we'll all blast off into space with Barbarella at the helm. Or maybe I'll just fantasize about having his Star Wars haircolor.

OK so I'm trying out Yahoo 360, which is still in beta and is still only available by invitation. It's basically another friendster/myspace--there's nothing really new under the sun here. But if anyone wants an invite, lemme know and I'll send you one, cux they give you a quintillion. I'm hoping that the people who I invited who have accepted are actually giving them beta suggestions--I am. And I'm hoping that they're taking them, because there needs to be more to this site to get people to sign up. There are sooooo many social networking sites out there; there just needs to be something different for this one to be worth signing up for. So if you're on 360, give them suggestions about how they can make the site better. With all the members Yahoo has access to, they should be able to create something really cool here.

And in other sites, I'm loving flickr. I've been on it for a while, but I've just lately been realizing its functionality, what with the tags and the notes and the descriptions. And then you have mappr, which basically maps photos from flickr according to geographic location. That's pretty cool. I hope there's something even cooler in the pipeline. So everyone go and get an account on flickr, and then add me as a contact & stuff.

And that's largely the beep for now, gnorklets!

Ed Shepp


v.p. said...

Don't shoot the messenger, I just report what I read:

victor said...

i guess i'm ugly.

i got an eye that is so lazy, it collects welfare.

Eric Jones said...

Our open profile at tribe (very similar to yahoo 360) has been getting quite the acclaim. Let me know if you want an invite:

Anonymous said...

you sound like a horribly insecure judgmental piece of shit